"Follow the child."

It is a beautiful, profound, and foundational Montessori principle. Our entire educational approach at West Suburban Montessori School, from our Toddler environments through Primary and Elementary, is built upon these three words. Supported by modern developmental science, proven by generations of children, and lived out daily by our guides and families, it is at the heart of everything we do.

It sounds simple in theory, but in the middle of a busy morning routine or evening rush, following the child can feel like a real challenge.

Here are five practical, manageable ways to bring this core Montessori value into your home life.

1. Stop, Look, and Listen

Observation is where everything begins. In our classrooms, our guides spend hours quietly observing children: noticing their sensitive periods, what draws their focus, and where they are building mastery.

At home, balancing parenting with work and daily routines means we are often rushing to keep up. While it isn’t realistic to observe all day, try finding moments to slow down, step back, and simply watch your child without interfering. Notice what materials or tasks hold their attention. Listen to how they express themselves when they don't know you are evaluating them. The best insights often come when you observe quietly until they forget you’re there.

You don't need to draw immediate conclusions or create an action plan from what you see. Simply observing who your child is in this exact developmental phase offers incredible insight for your parenting journey.

2. Make the Time

Children operate on a fundamentally different timeline than adults. It takes them longer to put on shoes, zip coats, or navigate an unexpected spill or hurt feeling.

Where possible, build buffer time into your family’s routine. Extra time allows you to respond with patience rather than urgency when a child is working through a challenge or practicing a practical life skill independently.

Do children need to learn how to stick to a schedule and adapt? Absolutely. But giving them space to process moments as they happen helps build resilience and trust.

3. Enthusiastically Embrace Their Individuality

As parents, we dedicate continuous effort toward our children's growth: their well-being, education, social development, and happiness.

Part of following the child means accepting that their passions, strengths, and preferences may look different than what we originally envisioned. They may choose interests outside our personal comfort zones, or show a natural preference for quiet introspection over group activities.

Honoring your child’s unique personality lets them know they are valued for who they are. Whether they are working through a challenge or discovering an unexpected strength, your child needs to know you are on their team unconditionally.

4. Examine Your Own Expectations

Our expectations as parents are naturally shaped by our own upbringings and experiences. Sometimes, without realizing it, we parent based on how things were done for us rather than what our child needs right now.

When setting boundaries or making rules, try pausing to ask yourself:

• What values am I trying to instill here?
• Am I choosing this because it reflects my core values, or because it’s how I was raised?
• Does this boundary truly support my child’s development and independence?

Self-reflection helps ensure that the limits we set are intentional, constructive, and supportive of the child's true needs.

5. Keep Learning Together

In the Montessori philosophy, learning is a lifelong journey shared by adults and children alike. Continuing to learn about child development, and being willing to admit when you don't have all the answers, models curiosity, humility, and growth for your child.

When your child sees you exploring new ideas and learning alongside them, they realize that knowledge is something to be actively pursued and cherished at every stage of life.

If you’d like to see our approach in action, we invite you to schedule a tour.